Pain That Is Choking From Inside !!!!

I have never thought that some day I would be writing such emotional and personal aspects of my life. I have always been a kind of a person who wanna hide from the limelight becuase it irritates me.

But today I am sharing some of the pages from my diary so that I can use this platform as a vent, an escape route that will help me to maintain my sanity and peace..especially when I am going to encounter one of the toughest examination of my life in the coming months and that to without her support which was there with me throughout the prelims preparation and I know from the core of my heart that this success belongs to her !!!! 

Today, I am living somehow may be by the memories, maybe almighty wants to punish me for loving someone so much that even god becomes insecure… A sin of love dear please come back, I have had enough of this if not then let me die in your lap.

How can I live with this? How can I forget you? How can I stop loving you? There’s not a single second when my tears don’t roll down on my face…… Yes the same face you once used to see smiling all around and at times even witout a reason !! There’s not a second when my heart doesn’t pain ….Yes the same heart you stole from me inadvertently !!!

The twinkle in my eyes has gone which was often visible when you were around me!! Yes the same eyes today  is full of tears ….. I feel like I am isolated from this world , the world seem to be so different without you !!!

I feel like I am away from my shadow as I am away from you I even cry in my sleep I see in the morning that  my pillow is wet !!! I hope one day all this  writings will be appreciated and with this hope call  it for the day!. You are being missed badly !!!!!

Loads of love and tonnes of wishes for you success. God bless you so that you can push all the limitations and move ahead with more vigour and mental toughness  🙂 🙂

Beparvah !!


28 thoughts on “Pain That Is Choking From Inside !!!!”

    1. Thank you so much!!!
      It’s a coincidence that, it’s only because of her, I was able to start this blog 3 months back, and she also helped me to complete my 100th posts today with all her memories !!

      Liked by 1 person

  1. It’s beautiful.

    Can you love God with same intensity?

    Can you see God in her?

    { Now don’t get mad at me ok?}

    I wish you very best for your exams 🙂

    Love and light ❤

    Anand 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Actually, on topics like god and faith..I consider myself to be naive. Honestly speaking, I have no capacity to understand such in depth areas but yes, I feel happy and satisfied when I see her smiling face, I feel complete when she is around..
      and thank you for your blessings…
      I really need them before this exam where am suppose to read a lot and deliver on 5 consecutive days with same intensity!!!!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I think time and the space will test my emotions and our relation (if at all exist) somewhere will surely turn up positively
      and even if it doesn’t , I will remain with all memories and cherish throughout my life!! I will find happiness in it!! 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. This is so beautifully expressed here Beparvah! All my very best wishes for your sweet love to return and for you to be able to focus and pass your exams. It’s a delicate time all around, I hope you have peace with everything soon. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  3. This poet and empathetic class (you and me included) choke a lot. A great scientist coined the term ‘melodramatic bronchospasm’.

    Once a kid swallowed a hanuman (hindu god) amulet, and parents came rushing in emergency in year 2002, my internship days. Since, we didn’t have pediatric endoscope to take it out, I gave a banana I was eating to the child. Hanuman amulet got pushed down, and came out through usual route. His parents cursed me for bringing revered Hanuman through the nasty route 🙂 Search for a banana, a new sweet love.

    By the way, the great scientist who coined the term is ‘me’.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Thou discovered, you should get, I just appreciated …
        I always appreciate novelty, and respect innovation because few can afford to innovate!!!


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