I never thought that I would write five posts in a day, but this is my number five and also dedicated to her, because she loves blog dedication !!!
Never I used to think of love life as such and until recently, my only love was my law books. This was my answer even that day when I was asked about my love life by her in the class…. But I think in my subconscious mind, I used to pray to the dear lord above.. for the profound wish of my heart, a perfect love… 🙂
And then I met her, who not only cars about me, but also used to scold me, at times she used to blackmail me emotionally because she knew that she matters a lot to me and also she used to read me better than what I do !!
I will always grief about the fact that I did not even got a the chance tho say to her “it’s you whom I adore, worship, it’s you who brought smile back into my life after years of darkness, it’s you who helped me to rejuvenate my relationship with my family and parents”.
But now, I walk around in the daze, my hollowed out interior filled with grief and smoky gloom, chocking me from inside.. I cannot believe that you are gone, because you meant a lot to me!!
I wish I could tell you that my loss is as wide as a starless night sky filled with darkness all around me!!! Am scared, scared of going back to the place I belong to…. I really miss the peace of mind and your friendship… your devotion ….. I have become a fountain of endless of tears, crying my heart out in the middle of a busy street !!!!
Yes, friends told me that I should move on with life…as it will heal the pain; I smile and mood my head while I am slowly going insane !!!
My heart is breaking inside, and it is still you whom I worship. Tears have become my friend since last five months but now I believe that I do not have any control over them at all ….
Yesterday, I s caught while I was having a nice sleepwalk, thinking that I am on the staircase of some building, posting to the almighty, hoping that you will soon change your mind someday !!!
I really don’t know what tho do tho get you back into my life, because I have got nothing left within tho lose anything further. You said once that ” we will cross the bridge one we get there “, but believe me I have crossed many such bridges in search of you and still I am on the run !!!
Loads of love and respect as always